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Title: How You Ruin Me
Chapter Title: Sam, I Think We Might Need to Talk About This Coupon Thing
Verse: How You Ruin Me
Fandom: Supernatural
Author: Kat
Rating: OT
Character(s): Sam Winchester, Dean Winchester, Bobby Singer
Pair(s): Sam Winchester/Bobby Singer
Genre: Non-Hunting Alternate Universe, Domestic, Season One Era
Warnings: Age Difference, Crossdressing, Estranged Brothers
Words: 1650
Beta:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
kiramaru7
Summary: Dean continues his surveillance and Bobby and Sam go grocery shopping.
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
Their next stop was a grocery store. Dean gave them plenty of time to make it into the store and start shopping, before he followed them. They had only gotten as far as the carts and they were already arguing when he found them.
“That’s one hell of a list, Sam.”
“The pantry’s bare, Bobby, and they’re having a canned and bulked food sale. And I have the calculator and the coupons.” Sam waved his well-used envelope stuffed with coupons and it had a card of some sort sticking out of it.
“What’s that thing?”
“Our store card.”
“We have a store card?”
“It gives us more coupons.”
“Sam, I think we might need to talk about this coupon thing.”
“Bobby, coupons are a good thing and it’s not like I’m ordering them in bulk or organizing them in a binder or something like those nuts on TV.”
“You gave me the stink eye for four days when I accidently threw out the paper last week.”
“You built a doomsday bunker. A doomsday bunker, whose shelves are stocked because of my couponing by the way. When I top building a doomsday bunker, we’ll discuss it. And the coupons in that paper would have made toilet paper come out to twenty seven cents a roll.”
“I had a free weekend. And the budget’s not that tight, Sam.”
Dean watched as they continued their bickering all the way over to the bulk food bins from his hiding spot by the lottery ticket vending machine. He had trouble sneaking closer as there wasn’t much to block him from their view in that part of the store. Not that there was much to observe. Sam was busy carefully filling, weighing, and tagging bags of nuts, dried fruit, popcorn, oatmeal, and several unidentifiable powdered substances. Dean wondered when his brother became a hippy. And what little conversation there was, wasn’t difficult to hear. Bobby’s voice carried.
“What’s that stuff?” Bobby pointed a bag of tiny black seeds.
“You’ve been eating them for three months. Don’t worry about it.”
“Sam…”
“What?” Sam didn’t see the problem as he knew that Bobby knew that he snuck healthy things into his food.
Bobby sighed. “And people wonder why I’m paranoid.”
“Oh, you were paranoid long before I came around.” Sam bagged up some dried lentils. Bobby cringed and started pulling the cart toward produce to get it over with and Sam away from the bulk bins. Sam followed behind, getting the hint.
Dean was not far behind. At least in produce there was a salt water taffy display to conceal him.
“So what do we need here?” Bobby asked gruffly.
“Grapes, bell peppers, broccoli, celery, green onions, and whatever you’re willing to eat without me sneaking it into your food.”
“Damn it, Sam.”
“I’m being more direct like you wanted.”
“I know that hospital visit weirded you out, but the doctor said I’m fine.”
“And he said that you need to take better care of yourself if you want to stay that way. Look, if you want me off your back about it, pick out two different fruits to eat this week.”
“You’ll shut your yap on the subject?”
“Until next time we go shopping.”
“Sam,” Bobby growled.
“Hey, I can do the shopping by myself.”
“And leave you unsupervised? Hell, no. Last time that happened, you came home with tofu.”
“But still under budget.” Sam smirked.
Bobby busied himself getting the produce Sam had asked for, letting Sam scribble down prices as part of his never ending pursuit in staying under budget.
Without a word, Bobby steered the cart down the next aisle and Sam followed behind without looking up, like they were tied together with a string, leaving Dean to scramble after them.
“So what do we need down here?”
“Applesauce, fruit leather, prunes…”
“Really, prunes, Sam?”
Sam ignored him. “…Peanut butter, jam, honey, canned pumpkin…”
Bobby’s face brightened. “That mean I get pumpkin pancakes?”
“Maybe. Protein bars and coffee.”
“Lemme guess. If I bring back applesauce and fruit leather without “no sugar added” on it and protein bars that aren’t high in fiber, you’re going to make me put them back?”
“But I will turn a blind eye if you bring back that strawberry jam that seems to be all high fructose corn syrup you love so much.” Sam tried to look as sweet as possible.
Bobby rolled his eyes and mumbled under his breath while he tackled his latest assigned task.
Sam proceeded to load the cart with bottled water, seltzer water, and sparkling water.
This did not go unnoticed by Bobby. “Sam, why are there three kinds of water in our cart when there is a perfectly good running sink at home?”
“It makes me feel better if you have water in the truck.”
“That much?”
“Okay, what if I only get half that much?”
“And take out the sparkling water.”
“Deal.”
Compromise made, they continued on.
“Where to next, Sam?”
“Refrigerated.”
Dean almost ran into a wine display, getting out of sight.
“Can you grab some eggs and string cheese from the other end while I grab stuff here?” Sam caught himself when he leaned in, before he actually kissed Bobby.
Bobby cleared his throat and rubbed his neck, slightly embarrassed by Sam’s near PDA. “Yeah, I’ll be right back. A dozen or eighteen count?”
Sam checked. “Coupon’s for the eighteen count.”
Bobby nodded and headed down the aisle.
Sam added hummus, low fat cottage cheese, and yogurt to their cart.
When Bobby returned, he eyed the yogurt unfavorably. “You’re going to make me drink smoothies again aren’t you?”
“You liked the smoothies. Besides yogurt has other good points.”
“Like what?”
Sam scribbled something down on his grocery list and showed it to Bobby. The older man turned bright red, but added more yogurt to the cart.
“I’ll go stand in line at the meat counter if you go tackle the condiment and spices aisle.”
“What do we need?”
“Hot sauce, chili pepper, cinnamon, and vegan mayo.” Sam figured Bobby would be reasonably agreeable since everything on that part of the list was for him.
“What the hell is vegan mayo?”
“You have been eating it for two months and didn’t notice. It won’t kill you to just go with it.”
“There better be some beef on that shopping list of yours somewhere for what you put me through.”
“I know better than to deny you beef for long.”
Bobby took the cart and they went their separate directions. Dean was not sure who to follow, but ended up tailing Bobby.
The older man dutifully picked up his assigned items and circled back the meat counter without incident. Sam however, was still stuck waiting in line.
“Want me to hit canned food?” Bobby was clearly lacking the patience to stand around in line.
“Yeah, please.” Sam handed him the list, knowing there was nothing left on it that should make Bobby balk too much or anything he’d have to check against a coupon.
Bobby made his way over to canned foods. Dean thought watching Bobby shop by himself was one of the most boring things ever. The way he managed to balance a case of canned tomatoes on the cart after filling the bottom wrack with several cases of beans without squishing anything was a bit impressive though. Bobby also seemed to be adding soups to the cart at random as he walked down the aisle and threw in some sardines as well as he turned the corner.
It was clear that Bobby had just decided to finish the list off himself by the way he kept studying it and roaming the store in what seemed like a random roaming pattern. It was nothing at all like the well plotted out path they were following earlier. He added frozen berries, two rotisserie chickens, bread, and a bar of dark chocolate to the cart before circle back to meat.
This time around, Sam was out of line, meat in hand. Bobby eyed the ground turkey and beef as it was added to the cart and was surprised by the addition of a large package of hot dogs.
“Hot dogs?”
“They’re for Rumsfield.”
“He gets hot dogs and you feed me soy dogs?”
“He didn’t collapse on top of me complaining of chest pains.”
Bobby quickly pushed the cart towards check out.
Dean didn’t feel like watching them check out. He made his way out of the store to sit and wait in the Impala to see where they would go next. He quietly fumed and impatiently drummed the steering wheel, trying to make sense of what he’d been watching all day. It made no sense to him. What the hell could Sam see in that cranky old bastard anyway? He barely recognized his brother anymore. Sam had always been a worrier and a hoverer, but what was with all that health food crap? And the beauty shop? It was like his baby brother’s personality had been cranked up to eleven. What the hell had this Bobby guy done to him? Dean quickly decided that Sam must have “that Patty Hearst thing” as he followed Bobby’s pick up out of the grocery store parking lot.
Unfortunately, the pickup was clearly headed out of town. Once Dean was certain it was headed back to the salvage yard, he pulled over and turned around. If he kept following, he knew he’d be noticed and he still hadn’t decided on how to contend with that dog he found out about.
Chapter Title: Sam, I Think We Might Need to Talk About This Coupon Thing
Verse: How You Ruin Me
Fandom: Supernatural
Author: Kat
Rating: OT
Character(s): Sam Winchester, Dean Winchester, Bobby Singer
Pair(s): Sam Winchester/Bobby Singer
Genre: Non-Hunting Alternate Universe, Domestic, Season One Era
Warnings: Age Difference, Crossdressing, Estranged Brothers
Words: 1650
Beta:
kiramaru7Summary: Dean continues his surveillance and Bobby and Sam go grocery shopping.
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
Their next stop was a grocery store. Dean gave them plenty of time to make it into the store and start shopping, before he followed them. They had only gotten as far as the carts and they were already arguing when he found them.
“That’s one hell of a list, Sam.”
“The pantry’s bare, Bobby, and they’re having a canned and bulked food sale. And I have the calculator and the coupons.” Sam waved his well-used envelope stuffed with coupons and it had a card of some sort sticking out of it.
“What’s that thing?”
“Our store card.”
“We have a store card?”
“It gives us more coupons.”
“Sam, I think we might need to talk about this coupon thing.”
“Bobby, coupons are a good thing and it’s not like I’m ordering them in bulk or organizing them in a binder or something like those nuts on TV.”
“You gave me the stink eye for four days when I accidently threw out the paper last week.”
“You built a doomsday bunker. A doomsday bunker, whose shelves are stocked because of my couponing by the way. When I top building a doomsday bunker, we’ll discuss it. And the coupons in that paper would have made toilet paper come out to twenty seven cents a roll.”
“I had a free weekend. And the budget’s not that tight, Sam.”
Dean watched as they continued their bickering all the way over to the bulk food bins from his hiding spot by the lottery ticket vending machine. He had trouble sneaking closer as there wasn’t much to block him from their view in that part of the store. Not that there was much to observe. Sam was busy carefully filling, weighing, and tagging bags of nuts, dried fruit, popcorn, oatmeal, and several unidentifiable powdered substances. Dean wondered when his brother became a hippy. And what little conversation there was, wasn’t difficult to hear. Bobby’s voice carried.
“What’s that stuff?” Bobby pointed a bag of tiny black seeds.
“You’ve been eating them for three months. Don’t worry about it.”
“Sam…”
“What?” Sam didn’t see the problem as he knew that Bobby knew that he snuck healthy things into his food.
Bobby sighed. “And people wonder why I’m paranoid.”
“Oh, you were paranoid long before I came around.” Sam bagged up some dried lentils. Bobby cringed and started pulling the cart toward produce to get it over with and Sam away from the bulk bins. Sam followed behind, getting the hint.
Dean was not far behind. At least in produce there was a salt water taffy display to conceal him.
“So what do we need here?” Bobby asked gruffly.
“Grapes, bell peppers, broccoli, celery, green onions, and whatever you’re willing to eat without me sneaking it into your food.”
“Damn it, Sam.”
“I’m being more direct like you wanted.”
“I know that hospital visit weirded you out, but the doctor said I’m fine.”
“And he said that you need to take better care of yourself if you want to stay that way. Look, if you want me off your back about it, pick out two different fruits to eat this week.”
“You’ll shut your yap on the subject?”
“Until next time we go shopping.”
“Sam,” Bobby growled.
“Hey, I can do the shopping by myself.”
“And leave you unsupervised? Hell, no. Last time that happened, you came home with tofu.”
“But still under budget.” Sam smirked.
Bobby busied himself getting the produce Sam had asked for, letting Sam scribble down prices as part of his never ending pursuit in staying under budget.
Without a word, Bobby steered the cart down the next aisle and Sam followed behind without looking up, like they were tied together with a string, leaving Dean to scramble after them.
“So what do we need down here?”
“Applesauce, fruit leather, prunes…”
“Really, prunes, Sam?”
Sam ignored him. “…Peanut butter, jam, honey, canned pumpkin…”
Bobby’s face brightened. “That mean I get pumpkin pancakes?”
“Maybe. Protein bars and coffee.”
“Lemme guess. If I bring back applesauce and fruit leather without “no sugar added” on it and protein bars that aren’t high in fiber, you’re going to make me put them back?”
“But I will turn a blind eye if you bring back that strawberry jam that seems to be all high fructose corn syrup you love so much.” Sam tried to look as sweet as possible.
Bobby rolled his eyes and mumbled under his breath while he tackled his latest assigned task.
Sam proceeded to load the cart with bottled water, seltzer water, and sparkling water.
This did not go unnoticed by Bobby. “Sam, why are there three kinds of water in our cart when there is a perfectly good running sink at home?”
“It makes me feel better if you have water in the truck.”
“That much?”
“Okay, what if I only get half that much?”
“And take out the sparkling water.”
“Deal.”
Compromise made, they continued on.
“Where to next, Sam?”
“Refrigerated.”
Dean almost ran into a wine display, getting out of sight.
“Can you grab some eggs and string cheese from the other end while I grab stuff here?” Sam caught himself when he leaned in, before he actually kissed Bobby.
Bobby cleared his throat and rubbed his neck, slightly embarrassed by Sam’s near PDA. “Yeah, I’ll be right back. A dozen or eighteen count?”
Sam checked. “Coupon’s for the eighteen count.”
Bobby nodded and headed down the aisle.
Sam added hummus, low fat cottage cheese, and yogurt to their cart.
When Bobby returned, he eyed the yogurt unfavorably. “You’re going to make me drink smoothies again aren’t you?”
“You liked the smoothies. Besides yogurt has other good points.”
“Like what?”
Sam scribbled something down on his grocery list and showed it to Bobby. The older man turned bright red, but added more yogurt to the cart.
“I’ll go stand in line at the meat counter if you go tackle the condiment and spices aisle.”
“What do we need?”
“Hot sauce, chili pepper, cinnamon, and vegan mayo.” Sam figured Bobby would be reasonably agreeable since everything on that part of the list was for him.
“What the hell is vegan mayo?”
“You have been eating it for two months and didn’t notice. It won’t kill you to just go with it.”
“There better be some beef on that shopping list of yours somewhere for what you put me through.”
“I know better than to deny you beef for long.”
Bobby took the cart and they went their separate directions. Dean was not sure who to follow, but ended up tailing Bobby.
The older man dutifully picked up his assigned items and circled back the meat counter without incident. Sam however, was still stuck waiting in line.
“Want me to hit canned food?” Bobby was clearly lacking the patience to stand around in line.
“Yeah, please.” Sam handed him the list, knowing there was nothing left on it that should make Bobby balk too much or anything he’d have to check against a coupon.
Bobby made his way over to canned foods. Dean thought watching Bobby shop by himself was one of the most boring things ever. The way he managed to balance a case of canned tomatoes on the cart after filling the bottom wrack with several cases of beans without squishing anything was a bit impressive though. Bobby also seemed to be adding soups to the cart at random as he walked down the aisle and threw in some sardines as well as he turned the corner.
It was clear that Bobby had just decided to finish the list off himself by the way he kept studying it and roaming the store in what seemed like a random roaming pattern. It was nothing at all like the well plotted out path they were following earlier. He added frozen berries, two rotisserie chickens, bread, and a bar of dark chocolate to the cart before circle back to meat.
This time around, Sam was out of line, meat in hand. Bobby eyed the ground turkey and beef as it was added to the cart and was surprised by the addition of a large package of hot dogs.
“Hot dogs?”
“They’re for Rumsfield.”
“He gets hot dogs and you feed me soy dogs?”
“He didn’t collapse on top of me complaining of chest pains.”
Bobby quickly pushed the cart towards check out.
Dean didn’t feel like watching them check out. He made his way out of the store to sit and wait in the Impala to see where they would go next. He quietly fumed and impatiently drummed the steering wheel, trying to make sense of what he’d been watching all day. It made no sense to him. What the hell could Sam see in that cranky old bastard anyway? He barely recognized his brother anymore. Sam had always been a worrier and a hoverer, but what was with all that health food crap? And the beauty shop? It was like his baby brother’s personality had been cranked up to eleven. What the hell had this Bobby guy done to him? Dean quickly decided that Sam must have “that Patty Hearst thing” as he followed Bobby’s pick up out of the grocery store parking lot.
Unfortunately, the pickup was clearly headed out of town. Once Dean was certain it was headed back to the salvage yard, he pulled over and turned around. If he kept following, he knew he’d be noticed and he still hadn’t decided on how to contend with that dog he found out about.
